Eric (center) and pals get ready for lunch

By Elaine Bergstrom
Ever since the plans to move Charlaine Harris’ vampire series to television were announced, fans of the books have been eagerly awaiting the arrival of the blond, millennium-plus-powerful vampire leader Eric. I don’t need to guess that they are angry. Vampire blogs have been filled with laments about the bad casting since Eric first put in an appearance last season.

Not that Swedish-born actor Alexander Skarsgard doesn’t have the looks to play Eric. He does and with the right script, he’s be perfect. In his brief moments in Season One, he exuded had a certain menace beneath those golden locks, even if he wasn’t menacing enough for Eric’s legion of fans. This season - with his foiled hair, telling Lafayette that Pam will kill him, etc. – Eric has become a joke, at least so far. When he shows up at the boutique where Bill is shopping for clothes for his vampire ward Jessica sporting newly bleached hair and metro clothing, it’s no wonder that the vamp-smitten saleswoman thinks Bill and the bleached and Eric are a couple. [Read more →]

Tags: Drama, Horror, Sci-Fi & Fantasy by Elaine
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by Karl J. Paloucek

If I could pick one thing everyone should have in their lives on a regular basis, near the top would be a bit of surrealism. If I could pick a second, it might as well be puppets. (Note that the two concepts rather complement one another.) Well, just in time for summer, IFC brings both your way in a new Internet transplant of sorts, Food Party, premiering June 9 as part of the IFC Automat.

Created and hosted by upload artist Thu Tran and a group of her art-school buddies, the series follows her adventures in and around her colorful, cardboard kitchen, with anthropomorphic plates, baked goods, vegetables and other bizarre bits of leftover nightmares that just want to sidle up next to her … often with some sort of ulterior motive.

It isn’t quite a cooking show, but Food Party does incorporate enough food into its mise en scene that you might think it’s going to turn into one at any moment. Whether we see Tran on a date with a man made of cabbage, carrots and asparagus, giving birth to a pie with a live kitten inside (I told you this was an exercise in surrealism) or gingerly, hesitantly tasting the guts of [Read more →]

Tags: Comedy, Horror, Lifestyle, Sci-Fi & Fantasy by kpaloucek
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by Karl J. Paloucek

Whether The CW is playing it safe in this troubled economy or it’s just basing its new work on its current successes (I’d like to think the latter, though it’s probably a bit of both), for you fans of the young-adult-skewed network, it doesn’t matter. All you need to know is to expect more of the same. In 2009, its cult-of-beauty lineup expands in some VERY familiar directions. Among the new shows announced:

Melrose Place (Tuesdays, 9pm ET/PT)
Yep, it’s happening. Not only has The CW succeeded in reinventing Beverly Hills, 90210 with its own version, now the network will complete the classic, early ’90s FOX lineup by pairing its 90210 with its reimagined sister show, Melrose Place. Fitting closely in the tradition of other CW series like Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill and, of course, 90210, the series focuses on the lives of “a diverse group of 20-somethings” who have become a tight-knit group while living together in a posh apartment building in the trendy Melrose neighborhood. Among the talent lined up for the show are returning cast members in Laura Leighton, still playing Sydney Andrews — the landlady of the building — and Thomas Calabro as Dr. Michael Mancini, but likely much of the buzz is going to be centered on the casting of Ashlee Simpson Wentz as 18-year-old new tenant Violet Foster, who has a secret connection to scheming landlady Sydney. Wouldn’t it be fun if the show [Read more →]

Tags: Drama, Horror, Reality TV by kpaloucek
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by Karl J. Paloucek

It might be a little disturbing, but it’s undeniable: There’s definitely an audience out there for films that take young, attractive stars and put them in harm’s way — particularly when that star is part of a pop phenomenon that’s both incredibly popular and has the capacity to annoy.

Such is the nature of the press release that just sluiced into my inbox regarding Gossip Girl star Jessica Szohr’s upcoming appearance in Piranha 3-D, a remake of 1978’s memorable, limited-budget Jaws knockoff, Piranha. Directed by Alexandre Aja — not long ago responsible for another horror remake, The Hills Have Eyes — the new film is expected to retain the original’s essential plot (a popular lakeside town’s residents become gristle for the deadly fish teeming in its waters), but likely will be a sexier update … especially with Jaws star Richard Dreyfuss putting in an appearance. [Read more →]

Tags: Drama, Horror, Movies by kpaloucek
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By Mike, Ryan and johnnysweeptheleg

As we join the action this week, things have been very productive at the Michael Scott Paper Company — that is, if practicing throwing cheese puffs into each other’s mouths from various angles and distances can be considered productive. As Pam points out, there’s only so much cold-calling you can do, and the company’s only other source of sales leads is Dwight, who has been secretly sharing information with Michael in the alley behind the Scranton Business Park. As luck would have it, Dwight is disgruntled because Charles has compromised his “attack readiness” by forcing him to wear long sleeves in the office. But when Charles recognizes the quality of Dwight’s work and rewards him with more responsibility — and an invitation to go out for drinks — Dwight cuts Michael off, and a feud is on. Michael vows to steal away all of Dwight’s customers, including Mr. Daniel Schofield of HarperCollins Publishers. The whole ugly mess plays out in Mr. Schofield’s office, where a frantic and now short-sleeved Dwight barges into Michael’s meeting and brings up the client’s gay son, unwittingly tipping the scales in his opponent’s favor. Michael Scott Paper Company 1, Dunder Mifflin 0.

[Read more →]

Tags: Comedy, Horror by Mike
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by Sarah

In the words of Brian, “Ah, the annual Quahog Star Trek convention — where once a year, sci fi buffs take their lips off the barrel of a loaded gun and spend half a day adjusting their eyes to sunlight.” Since Peter was kicked out of last year’s convention for insulting Shatner, he brings the whole reluctant family this time. Stewie buys blueprints of the transporter, professes his love of Picard over Kirk, and attends the cast Q&A session in which the only questions people ask are about buildup on household sponges, skin conditions, and low pressure in artesian wells. Which Stewie thinks is horse@#$%.

[Read more →]

Tags: Animation, Comedy, Horror by knockturn
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Posted by Mike and johnnysweeptheleg

Jack: I'd like a "window" seat, please.

It’s a good time to be a Lost fan. We’re finally getting some answers this season — so many, in fact, that we don’t even mind that just as many new questions are being raised. Plus, coming off last night’s episode, which was undeniably awesome, we have “The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham” to look forward to next week. When we spoke to Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof before the season began, that’s the episode they pointed to as potentially being as mind-blowing “The Constant” was last season. But enough about next week, let’s talk about last night…

johnnysweeptheleg’s Lost in a Moment:

Ever since Bearded Transient Jack slurred to Kate, “We gotta go back!” a season ago, Lostees have been waiting for this moment. And last night, we finally got it – right at the start of the episode, no less, with Jack opening his eyes to find that he’s once again welcome to the jungle.

[Read more →]

Tags: Drama, Horror by Mike
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By ElaineB
Lesson learned: Google prospective boyfriends

I used to work with a gorgeous young woman with a very active dating schedule. The secret to her success in finding good men, she said, was weeding out the losers. She googled names, checked arrest records, whatever she could find before she moved beyond that first coffee date. To me, trusting soul that I am, her actions seemed a bit extreme. But Marika, Dubaku/Samuel’s girlfriend, should have done the same. Of course, she would have come up with nothing, as Samuel did not exist, but she might have tried. And, as noted in my column last week, had the FBI made public a mugshot of Dubaku, this season’s 24 would have gone in a very different direction for a few hours. I mean, clearly Dubaku knew they were looking for him already, so how would telling people there was a terrorist in their midst have hurt? And we could have enjoyed watching a few wannabe cowboys trying to take him down or having Dubaku sitting in Marika’s diner when his face flashes on the screen above the cash register trying to play innocent or hide his face. Or we would have watched Marika dealing with the dilemma: Do I believe the man I love or do I turn him in? [Read more →]

Tags: Action, Documentary, Drama, Horror by Elaine
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Posted by johnnysweeptheleg and Mike

The year is 1988. The Summer Olympics are being held in Seoul, South Korea. Super Mario Bros. 3 is released in Japan. And Jin is trying to figure out WTF he’s doing washed up on an island with a very pregnant and half-her-should-be-age Rousseau.

So “This Place is Death” isn’t about Cleveland, after all, huh? The island is death. Ok, now we get the title. Man, we love this show!

johnnysweeptheleg’s Lost in a Moment:

Thanks to earlier seasons of Lost, we all know that Rousseau’s team is wiped out, leaving Rousseau alone and crazy, eventually. The fun part about the time travel game is we’re afforded the opportunity to see the how. And the moment the Frenchies convince Jin to take them to the radio tower, we know this means all sorts of no good for the team. Speaking of the team, Hey Lost, what’s up with the Abercrombie-looking a-hole? He looks more 2008 than 1988.

Evidently, the smoke monster dislikes Abercrombie even more than us, and after throwing Nadine around, snatches the Abercrombie a-hole and attempts to drag him into, well, a hole. Rousseau’s baby daddy and Jin grab hold of him and attempt to keep the smoke monster from dragging him down beneath The Orchid, but to no avail. The smoke monster gets Abercrombie, minus one arm, which Jin and the babby daddy are left holding. And just like that, Def Leppard gets their drummer. Any coincidence that 1988 is also the year “Pour Some Sugar On Me” goes number one on Dial MTV for 73 days? I think not, my friends. [Read more →]

Tags: Drama, Horror by johnnysweeptheleg
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Posted by Mike and johnnysweeptheleg

Thankfully, despite the episode being titled, “The Little Prince,” it had nothing to do with the child of Michael Jackson.

After its fair dose of “Whoa!” moments (said with our best Keanu Reeves impersonation) in the first few episodes, the Lost writers took a step back and let us breathe a little this week. However, that’s not to say that we didn’t have any revelations this week.

And there are always going to be more questions than answers.

To the recap!

johnnysweeptheleg’s Lost in a Moment:

When I was a kid, it was all about getting Hypercolor shirts. On the island, it’s about getting nosebleeds. Everybody’s doin’ it! Charlotte’s nosebleeds have gotten exponentially worse, to the point of passing out for hours. Evidently, Lindsay Lohan also did lots of time traveling for a while there.

Locke has resumed leadership of The Islanders, and decided that a trip back to the Orchid is in order since that’s where it all began. But the Orchid is a far hike, and with all of the time shifting, a dangerous one at that. Sawyer and Locke do all they can not to bump into their former selves. Like us, they all saw Back To The Future and believe Doc Brown when he said it could cause problems with the Space-Time Continuum. Instead, Sawyer continues his season of angst, and nearly breaks down after seeing Kate assisting Claire with the birth of Aaron. Before he can attempt to reach out to her and flirt with paradoxing, another time shift occurs. [Read more →]

Tags: Drama, Horror by johnnysweeptheleg
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