Dance Moms | 2/9 | Channel Guide Magazine

Dance Moms Season 3 Episode 10 recap: Loves Me, Loves Me Not

March 5, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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So I went on a little fact-finding mission this weekend, Dance Moms faithful. I actually attended a three-day dance competition. Applause Talent’s regional dealie in Madison, Wisconsin, where my beautiful niece competed with her studio, Ignite Dance. Here are some of the things I learned. There are way too many dances at these things. I have no idea how the judges keep who’s who and what’s what straight from solo No.1 to large group No. 403. I suspect it has something to do with the tablet computers in front of them. And the little microphones into which they jabber incessantly [...]

Dance Moms Season 3 episode 9 recap: The Tears And A Clown

February 26, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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Well, Dance Moms fans, we already know from last week’s preview that this episode’s going to be a tough one for any number of reasons, so I’m glad we get to the toughest right out of the gate. As we get underway, everyone files into the studio but Abby. Christi is hoping that Teacher skipped class so they get extra recess — but Abby appears and tearfully reveals that Broadway Baby succumbed to kidney failure the night before. Now I am the world’s biggest sucker for animals and the world’s biggest believer in the power of pets to comfort and [...]

Dance Moms Season 3 episode 8 recap: Friendship Not

February 19, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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This week on Dance Moms, Cathy, Abby and Jill are all cellmates in a New Jersey minimum-security women’s prison after the “sprinkle sprinkle whack the star” brawl back in Voorhees. Nah, they’re not. But it would have made for a great episode, isn’t that right, Dance Moms faithful? Beyond Scared Straight: Voorhees. Actually it’s just another day at the studio, where Christi is still missing and the other mothers are discussing it. They don’t get to discuss for too long, because look who’s marching back to war. On the lobby side of the dressing room door, this happens. Someone has mastered [...]

Dance Moms recap: Rotten to the Core

February 12, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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OK, Dance Moms fans, before we get going on 90 minutes of Dance Mama (and Papa) drama, I have a question for those of you who do such a fine job of educating me about the dance world, since I’m such an outsider looking in. The thing we are at this week is called an “intensive.” This intensive. Wild Dance Intensive — a division of Starpower. Now my admittedly limited understanding of an intensive is that it is like dance school meets summer camp only more … intense. But educational, all the same. Not competitive. So imagine my confusion at [...]

Dance Moms recap: Four Dudes in O-hi-o

February 8, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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Were you worried, Dance Moms faithful … or Dance Moms Desperate . .. or whatever we’re calling ourselves now? I’m sorry I’m late. I had a short-notice thing to do in New York. And I’ll admit I did consider bagging out on this one, just for a little respite, a dab of relief. But then I spotted a familiar face in the promo. A good, kind, nice kid, like the seven other good, kind, nice kids we’re trying desperately to support. Zack Torres. From Abby’s Ultimate Dance Competition. And his nice mom Gina. Dancing on the newly reinvented all-boy Candy Apples [...]

Dance Moms recap: Studio Black and Blue

January 29, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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I don’t even know what to say about this episode, Dance Moms faithful. I don’t even know how to try to fish out something good. I do know there’s a boatload of us trying hard to tell ourselves that the show’s worst moments are scripted and everyone does a big ol’ group hug at the end of the day and laughs about the ruse. But these girls are not actresses. And their tears and their stressed-out faces are so horribly, clearly real. And on full display in each and every episode this season with precious little to diffuse that. I [...]

Dance Moms recap: You’re (Immi)grating On My Nerves

January 22, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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This week’s Dance Moms is all about home. Wanting to get there. Being left there. Has Sophia gone back there? We even get a look at Abby’s. Or at least the garage. To start, the gang — minus Sophia — has gathered just in time for the resurrection of the pyramid. Oh pyramid. I have (not) missed you so. Bottom of the bottom is Chloe. Seems that extended back stretch in the middle of her solo last week was not part of the choreography. It was Chloe forgetting the choreography. Despite her meltdown at the end of the ep, a suddenly [...]

Dance Moms recap: Picking at Scabs

January 15, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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Looks like we’re divided kinda 50-50 on whether we’re OK with Abby’s new dancers or not, Dance Moms fans. Which is bad news for the half who aren’t so charmed, because even after last week’s so-so success, the scabs are back and Abby’s still hoping the Pitt Crew will soon be but a memory. No such luck, Abs — they’re back as well, with Mrs. Hyland in tow. Kel says that she realizes that the way Abby treats her girls is never going to change and since they miss the studio and they miss Miss Abby, may as well go [...]

Dance Moms recap: Mutiny On The Abby

January 8, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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Tonight’s episode of Dance Moms begins with another parking lot conference, during which the mothers decide it’s their job to determine whom the competition team will be at the studio that belongs to Abby Lee. Even Holly’s onboard. She says they must stand up for what is right. Like telling a business owner how to run her business. To put their plan into action, they begin by gliding silently past an incredulous Abby and hiding out in the ladies room. Then they come out of the ladies room. They sit across from Abby and have themselves a silent pout. Atta [...]

Dance Moms recap: Angels and Demons and A Guy Named Mark

January 1, 2013 | By Lori Acken
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Well, all you Dance Moms fans who skipped out on Abby’s Ultimate Dance Competition, you missed yourself quite a spectacle. Not to mention some context about Abby’s snazz-tastic new look and Hollywood attitude — and all the helpless AUDC references I am going to make until I get it out of my system. But back in Pennsylvania, it’s the first day back after competition season break and there are hugs all around — except that Kelly and the Hyland girls are nowhere to be found. Christi, however, has been growing out her hair, looks like Jill cut hers, and I [...]